Meager but mostly eager were the 2024’s pickings of yet another batch of lamestream n00bs over at the RMR Office tower. Records of entitled established mainstream bands bestowed with a true metal pedigree that never made it onto our review pipe before. Amazingly, acts boasting a felt gazillion years of service and the sky-high opinion of die-hard fans should sway our stone-cold hearts to worship the fans’ gnarly objects of desire. But not so, or at least not right away. So, as always, the RMR Review desk gave those newcomers a little push to reveal their trve nature without succumbing to ideologically challenged fanboi wankery.
And you guessed it. 2023’s crop was as varied as it was sometimes utterly surprising. Yet, 2024 lost some of that luster despite some good to great specimens battering away with their axes.
Wormholes, epic battles, galactic fantasies, and honest yet sometimes belladonna-laced opinions straight ahead!
Wormed – Omegon
The fawningly abject fanboyism surrounding Wormed latest (and hopefully last) record was astounding. The band sports some true talent helping them with their aggressive piece of sensory overload in search of new fans. This seems to be an act with a firm belief that ‘moar’ is always better. And, also, that hammering your audience with an avalanche of advanced sound salads would lift them to the Valhalla of the valiant space warriors guild. Or something. A slew of glowing fans out there truly seemed to think of Wormed as metal royalty. And that is where we will beg to differ. Throwing garbled tracks full of unintelligible metal extremes at a wall of sound and seeing what sticks was never a good strategy. And it showed. Moar for moar’s sake won’t work too well, even if their technical prowess landed them pretty high on the rating scale. 5/10.
Dark Tranquility – Endtime Signals
If you’re looking for an Amon Amarth-style aggression, this record won’t be for you. Pretty sturdy on the metal upfront and boasting a finely polished production, Endtime Signals won’t be storming any beaches. Instead, they’ll stay in the safe realm of the middle of this relatively calm stream of Gothic and Melodic Death Metal. A finely carved piece of moments that – undoubtedly – will please the mainstream crowd and non-metalheads alike. Yet, for the RMR crew, the record was a tad too slick and devoid of surprising killer turns and dangerous rock-infested rapids. A good record that may be played on a relaxed sunny afternoon at RMR’s Metal Teaparty. But a blood-thirsty metal session in a sweaty music hall? Not sure. 6/10.
Hammerfall – Avenge The Fallen
The grizzly metalheads of the dark abyss might disagree, but Power Metal truly has a fun factor to it. It is Metal of the Light where warriors in shiny armor happily ride into battle. Hammerfall here galloped onto the battlefield with a vengeance and some boundless energy. And that’s astonishing, given their advanced age where others usually retire to their very own abodes. Old warhorses galloping to wreak havoc amongst the enemy. A true fun record and also one of the most memorable Power Metal ones on RMR this year. 7/10.
Blitzkrieg – Blitzkrieg
A relatively unknown yet very old metal band that somehow sailed under many a radar over the years. An album art smacking of oldish metal lore, dusty battles over at the crazy Mad Max fair, and funky little monsters to hunt with your sword. That wasn’t an appealing first impression – at all. But the moment the Heavy Metal galloped away, all of the above went out the window pretty fast. Blitzkrieg don’t have a metal pedigree with a shiny list of snazzy records, but they for sure contributed to the Lore ov Metal over many years of service. And their Heavy Metal is first-rate and pulls you along as Dream Evil should have done earlier. So, kudos – and long may they continue to hone their mighty metal roar. 7/10.
Nile – The Underworld Awaits Us All
1993 is the year that Nile entered the world of metal. And ever since, they sent brutal slabs of alloy our way. And yet, more than 30 years of Neanderthal pounding and technical excesses didn’t quite slow them down. Instead, the band sent us a diabolically complex piece that is as much its very own enemy as it is technically astute. A band lost in a vortex of its own making specializing in a rare breed of unhinged Technical Death Metal. One that forges ahead come hell, high water, or those dreaded modern changes. A piece the RMR crew had its issues with but finally embraced nonetheless. 6/10.
And that was it already for the n00b crowd of 2024. Established bands that somehow evaded attention at the office tower over the years. The RMR crew’s of course already eagerly looking forward to a new crop of wizened old geezers waltzing our way next year. Stay tuned.